Mark Flider’s Blog

For the first time in a very, very long time, I ran my Roomba. I had either a) been too lazy to pick up all the crap and wires and stuff, or b) forgotten. Upon starting it up, I discovered two important problems with it:

1. The battery life had dwindled to about 5 minutes
2. One of the batteries in the remote had exploded, leaving an awful smelling substance inside, and rendering it useless (even after exchanging both batteries).

Both of these things caused me great joy. Why, you ask? Because this gives me an excuse to replacing my old, aging Roomba with a brand new Roomba!

Roomba = Awesome

For those who don’t get excited over vacuuming-based products, allow me to briefly summarize why the Roomba is so awesome:

1. It cleans your floors without you having to do it yourself.
2. It’s a robot.
3. It’s a step towards realizing Ray Bradbury’s beautiful short story, “There Will Come Soft Rains,” from The Martian Chronicles.

Apart from having to empty the dirt receptacle, the Roomba Scheduler could in theory start up, vacuum my apartment, then return to its station to charge — every single day — whether I’m alive to appreciate it or my corpse is slowly decomposing on my couch. Technology is wonderful like that.

Back to the Story

So anyway, at first I was going to get a $225 Roomba Discovery, and buy a separate $59 Scheduler Pack from iRobot, since this seemed the cheapest way to go. What I ended up doing was buying the $329 Roomba Scheduler, complete with all the little scheduling doodads.

I went to Bed Bath and Beyond to pick up the Roomba Scheduler, but sure enough, they didn’t actually have any in stock, only the Roomba Discovery and the Scooba (which cleans/mops floors).

So I asked the people there, and eventually this guy led me over to a computer, where he checked on the inventory. Apparently that store had never had that model. For that matter, the total number of Roomba Scheduler’s in all the Bed Bath and Beyond stores in America, combined, was 10.

So I had to order it. The downside is I have to wait 3-11 business days for it to be delivered, instead of walking home with my instant gratification.

But Wait

So I bought this $329 version at Bed Bath and Beyond, plus tax and shipping, for $371.

But wait! As it turns out, Best Buy was having a sale on that model for $229, and Bed Bath and Beyond price matches. So it wasn’t $371, it was $264.

But wait! I also had a 20% off coupon that Bed Bath and Beyond mails out every week, so the price wasn’t $264, it was $213.

But wait! Since they didn’t have any in stock and they had to order me one, shipping was free! So it wasn’t $213, it was $198.

But wait! They were having a promotion, where buying a Roomba gets you a $50 gift card. So really, it wasn’t $198, it was $148.

Suckers

And that’s how I ultimately raped Bed Bath and Beyond. Now I rub my hands together and wait for my delivery…

Posted 2 years, 9 months ago, under General.
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